The Sunday Message

No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather. ― Michael Prichard

The first time I heard part of that quote was from former U.S. Senator Conrad Burns. Conrad passed away this week, so he has been in my thoughts.

I can’t remember which senator Conrad said he was talking to (it may have been Robert Byrd). The other senator was complaining in private to Conrad that he was pretty much hated by members of his own party because of some tough votes he made or because of some appropriation requests that he turned down. The other senator said that he was so disliked that probably nobody would even come to his funeral if he died today. Conrad told him he shouldn’t worry about that because the size of his funeral would pretty much depend on the weather.

That is probably pretty true – at least from my experience with funerals.

During one of my parent’s funerals, the weather was terrible. It was one of those days in Missouri when the freezing rain basically stopped everything. Luckily the service was held at the same location as the cemetery where my mother or father was to be buried.

The pellets of snow and freezing rain bounced off the umbrellas as the final words were said. People were shivering and when the short final prayer ended, people quickly left.

When my sister died, the services were held at the same cemetery. It was so hot – almost 100 degrees that we kind of moved away from the gravesite so we could stand in the shade of a nearby tree to get out of the sweltering sun. It was also a short service.

As I grow older I think of funerals and things like that. Especially after someone I know dies.

I told my wife that I did not want a funeral because probably nobody would attend. I also wanted to be cremated and my ashes scattered in Montana and, if possible, near my boyhood home of Mill Grove, Missouri (Google it).

She told me that she would consider it, but I would be dead. She said she would do what she wanted. I think she was joking…

I do know that when my time is up that I am going to Heaven. Are you?

Always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t come to yours. – Yogi Berra

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2 thoughts on “The Sunday Message

  1. As a non-believer people tell me I’m going to Hell. I’m fine with that as long as it’s near the one in the Caymans and not the bucolic burg in Michigan. At least they exist in reality.

    • Doug – I don’t think anyone should tell anyone they are going to hell. I’ve heard Heaven is like paradise…and paradise is sometimes in the eye of the beholder. -JmB

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