Secession (is) For Dummies

Back in 2008 Conservatives warned Americans that if elected Barack Obama would take our guns. It’s now 2012 and my guns are still safe and secure in my house – the same place where they have been for the past four years.

I know, I know, he’ll probably come for them now since he was re-elected – he can really do terrible stuff since he does not need to trick us for our votes.

Thankfully, I already have my underground bunker stocked and ready…

Recently in the news I’ve seen that several people from all across the fruited plains want their states to secede from the Union since Obama was re-elected. Over the weekend a faithful reader sent me a link to the Montana Petition on the “We the People” section of the White House website. It was good for a chuckle and I thought it was a joke – you know – like a state legislator asking, “to be paid in gold and silver coins.”

I guess the petition and state legislator wanting to be paid in gold and silver coins is not a joke.

Here’s what the petition states:


Peacefully grant the State of Montana to withdraw from the United States of America and create its own NEW government.

We the people of the great state of Montana, do see that in today’s world the Federal Government has not led our citizens justly and with honor. We therefore as free men and women of our great state do believe that it is time to take matter upon ourselves to ensure our continued freedom, and to enact our own laws and here buy govern ourselves without the federal government’s involvement in our internal matters from this day forward.

They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.

Benjamin Franklin: 1775

You know people are very serious when they use a quote from Benjamin Franklin to make a point, but I feel the following Franklin quote fits the succession movement best:

“We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.”

So, as of this morning there are 11,406 electronic signatures on the Montana petition. These “signers” are from highly recognizable Montana cities like West Palm Beach and across the state to Seattle.

Before you start looking for your Rand McNally Road Atlas, these places are really not located in Montana. Anyone from anywhere can sign the petition.

According to the “Terms of Participation” on the website, to get a response, “a petition must reach 25,000 signatures within 30 days.”

I’m thinking some people could single out states they don’t like and start a petition to rid the United States of that state. May I suggest we start with Iowa…

But let’s get serious for a moment: If Montanans really wanted to make a difference, they would start a petition to get a Red Lobster restaurant in Great Falls…

Published in: on November 14, 2012 at 7:51 am  Comments (2)  
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  1. […] an issue I wrote about last Wednesday, Lee Newspapers is reporting today, “A tea party group based in Billings has […]

  2. Heh. Still amazes me how many people clamor for Red Lobster here. And I’m actually a bit surprised that there isn’t a genuine seafood restaurant in GF. We’ve got the steak, burger, Mexican, Asian, Greek, etc, areas covered, but no “primary” seafood eatery. You can get crab legs and lobster at Borrie’s, etc, but still…

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